As gross as the above picture looks, you guys know I can't help but to keep it real with yall. So, after a lovely night of la-le-lagging which basically means doing absolutely nothing, my loving mother comes in with a treat. And as a trini, I was over joyed to see this lovely piece of roti that had been broughten to delight my belly. Only it did not turn out how I planned, while eating, I stated directly to my love "something does not taste right with this" so I cannot say I wasn't in total shock of the outcome of this morning.

Needless to say, after the long time spent out of the oven and pot into the hands of my mother,
sitting and waiting for her to finish her half and enjoy her conversation with a friend, and then the long journey home, it didn't turn out to good. Everyone knows curry cannot be sitting out for more then two - three hours or else your belly is in jeopardy. Well I foundout the hard way, that what I thought was fresh wasn't to fresh at all.

Now to wake up in the morning, to have to sprint to the bathroom hand over mouth is pretty disturbing to say the least but when it starts to feel like your insides are being torn out by a mini demon, you know your ass is not in luck (literally). Myself and mr.toilet bowl have become greatly aquanted atleast, I never really noticed how spacious and nice the interior of my bathroom is, syke.

I'm going to lay down now, before I leave a unforgiveable mess on my keyboard.
May, I note I had to stop to take three bathroom breaks while filling yall in, I am not a happy camper ! toast, to all the pretty toilet bowls & complimentary toilet paper.

"Exxxes"

She be callin my name screamin real loud,
I would think she was in pain
Niggas tried to tell me her head was insane
Everything she do would take a toll on my brain
It seemed a little strange
She be callin my name.

She don't got a name so for now let's call her ashley
Had her gym clothes on, seen her when she passed me
Met her up at Exxon, her body was the nicest
Cursin up a storm, she complainin bout the prices
She just left Toronto, for Jerz bought a condo
Know everything about her but we aint never had a convo
Pops wasnt around much, her mother raised her
Got so much in common that I dont like to face her
Her parents is dope heads, she dropped out of school too
Got the same tat's as me, and I found that unusual
Mad i smoke cigs said they bad for my own health
Said she'll never love me, cause I dont love my own self
Gave me the ass the first night, and I gladly tossed it
The best part was I aint have to ask for it
Her period dont ever come in, when I dick her down
She always runnin but she be callin my name.

She like to scream so the neighbors might hear her
For some reason liked it in front of the mirror
Let me make it clearer
She be makin strange requests and I aint talkin bout just pullin her hair
She be sayin choke me like I lost all respect
And every time I do a mark show up on my neck
She say punch her, smack her, like im her attacker
I say you a fool, she say just do what I asked ya
I be goin slower till she tell me do it faster
Every time I'm out with her, niggas just harass her
I dont understand it, she's so unattractive
Shorty lookin terrible, plus she come with baggage
I tap it, though she below my average it deceives me
She be talkin marriage sayin she'll never leave me
I say imma bounce but I say I dont believe me
She fucks me every time she sees me.

I be wantin to strangle her, throw her off the balcony
Dangle her, mangle her, how long have I carried this anger for
How come when we argue, we gotta get physical
we crucial conflict, she end up in critical
Habitual, happens daily like its her ritual
but show your face bitch, stop bein invisible
is it just my mental, is she just a symbol
there for me to look at everything that I resemble
sometimes during sex I blurt another name
do that mean I look at me and be ashamed
of cheatin on me, wit a hottie, wit a body who so happen
to embody everything that I so happen to not be
I be tryna leave her, but then I get leanient
since im in this room alone, she becomes convenient.
then we lie together, cry together, I swear I hope we die together

Look, I finally grew the balls to tell shorty we should seperate
save your breath, nothin u can do to make me hesitate
theres no room for me and you to grow
dont love me, or leave me alone, do both did she
Apologize for anything that she did said without me,
she cant think of no reason to live
said she'll miss gettin piped down
then she picks up a shank
I had to tell the crazy bitch to put the knife down
cryin, eyeshadow on her face, filthy
feel me, if you kill you, its gonna kill me
really, she said you neglect me
I said we the same so, whatever you do is gonna affect me
you know I can`t let it be, naw
so if we gotta stay together just to co-exist, so it is
she said I love you, and hugged me, took her pants off,
and procceded to fuck me.

--

Joe Budden's making a come back, and I don't know about yall.
But hell i'm feeling it, from his first released single
"In my sleep" to this song, he's got me feeling his style.
Check out "padded room" soon to be or already released,
still unsure, but as more music gets released and if I
continue to feel it some more, I will keep yall in the know.
But man, can I relate to this song lol in his perspective,
not in the girls lol but check it out nevertheless !
Tell me if your feeling it as must as I am,
"cause, he be calling my name!"

Someone tell me why, people can't say what's on their mind now a days?
Why is it that something that should be said, during a conversation between two,
can never be shared, why people can't expresss their feelings to one another,
but can express it to others. Is it because their 'not real' or is it because they
are afraid of how what they had to say would be 'received' or are they unsure
of the possible consequence of the words they may share.

One reason, why I have no fear, when it comes to speaking my mind to anyone, whatever comes to mind, is something that will eventually be said or shared. Either the person takes it well or doesn't, what's better? Me blogging about it? for them to fall on, or confront them and solve it? Hmm.. really ponder it, because I know alot of people are gonna pick the first, but why? If I can't talk to them about any and everything, why are they even in my life? even more importantly, why do I even call them my friend? Let's be real, everyone has their circle of people you should be able to say or share anything with them, without having to think twice, no matter what you think their reaction maybe, you should be able to keep it one-hundred with the people around you always.

I learned the hard way what the meaning of a true friend is, one of my true friends were revealed to me two years ago, during an argument, our first of fifteen years of friendship and it's because I was unaware of my actions, unaware of how I was affecting myself and others, and she kept it real, she showed me everything about myself to my actions but she didn't know the reason for my actions and this was the first time I revealed the real me to somebody and I realized keeping it real with people really is an important thing.

I see it like this, not everyone is gonna agree with your actions, not everyone is gonna like you, not everyone you think is real, is real, not everyone who has a smile on their face infront of you has good intentions or thoughts towards you. The simple thing is, those that you call "friends" you should know everything about, those you call close you should be able to talk to, those you rely on should be able to keep it real with you. And if they can't they shouldn't be with you.

If I do something to hurt you, let me know.
If I do something to offend you, let me know.
If you don't like the choice I made, let me know.
If you don't like the path i've chosen, let me know.
If your opinion on me has changed, let me know.
If you don't think i'm being real with you, let me know,
Whatever the case may be, let me know.

If you still got reason why you feel you can't share something you want to say towards me, and I findout about it through another source that isn't you, I won't confront you, but don't be suprised when I turn my back your way, because a person I call a "friend" should be able to keep it real with me always. Fuck all the excuses, fuck the fact you thought this and that just be real there is no problem with that, but if you can't do that read the above statement because anything you thought we had, you have now erased.

"Bitch Please !"

Ps : Do not catch feelings, this was not directed to anyone in particular.

" Domino's Pizza"

So I don't think this is right,
But it should literally be called,
domi - nose .. did you see what he did?
that made me want to stop all ordering of fast food.
I almost puked in my mouth, only to be relieved that
hey ! I never eat from them anyways.

Then to my sad realization, I had once upon a time
but that's besides the point.. I worked at two fast
food resturants in my day, which shall remain nameless
and things like this are common as disgusting as that may sound
yes, you better believe it. There has probably atleast been
one nasty burger, pizza, sandwhich, etc. That you have devoured
and digested atleast once in your life, and you didn`t even know !

Now, did your stomache flip?
because I know for a fact mine did.

This brings me to a story that happened at,
one of my former places of employment,
Have you ever complained and brought back a meal more then once?
well the fact, is your food was probably tampered with.
This customer continuously brought back her burger meal
to the point were the cooks were fed up and were going to
a) spit on the burger b) drop it on the floor c) other.
Yes, it's horrible and also a reason I never piss the person
that is making my food or taking my order off !

This has been a public health and food announcement
Be careful what you eat !

"Spend precious time with the ones who are,
near and dear to you, make memories, share laughs,
and roll blunts (lol) enjoy the time you have here,
and live life to it's fullest"

Just like my status says :
"I'm no longer planning events,
and inviting or adding people in plans.
If you hear that I am attending and want to come along,
from now on you ask, you will not be asked.
Yes, that means you will not be invited to
girls nights, chill time, or house tings.
Those that have been coming out to events ;
yall are the best ! most memorable times.
Those that havent your not being invited again :)"

If you have good reason for
why you missed out on majority, oh well as well.
Because I know theres alot of times,
people dont come out cause of certain people
and people just dont come out for
whatever nonsense problem related reason.
I don't make plans for no reason,
lifes to short to not enjoy the moments
you get to spend with your people.

I'm just keeping it real.
People don't take in that lifes short
uh like your here today, gone tmrw.
Your days aren't guaranteed.
You got to enjoy and live life while you can.
I'm not trying to be insensitive,
but sometimes I hear real bs,
foolish reasons, and I can be the nicest person
until it turns into a routine, I only invite those that
I care about and care to spend time and make memories with..

If you dont wanna be one of those people then so be it,
there not coming out with me from here on out.
I learned the importance of family & good friends,
alot of people take shit for granted.
Like I wouldn't say any of this if I didn't genuinely
care or consider these friendships important.